A New Perspective - May 15, 2007
I thought I had a good barometer for what people liked. The first four jobs I got in this business were Romeo and Juliet, Scream, Boogie Nights, and As Good as It Gets. I remember reading those scripts and another script called Meet the Deedles. I knew those first four were going to be great and Meet the Deedles was going to be complete shit. Today, Meet the Deedles might make 200 mil. Today, I wouldn't know. It's so unpredictable, it makes me wanna puke. I can't take the instability.
Which is probably why I went into a deep depression after I did Son of the Mask. Here was a movie that was going be like a live action cartoon with inventive animation, sick special effects, and a simple theme that people could relate to: the fear of growing up and actually having a first child...who may be able to fly and shit.
I know it looks nothing like that now, but that was the script and the idea in the beginning, and the plan was very exciting. Plus my only other offer at the time was Without a Paddle. It was like choosing between constipation and diarrhea; I chose diarrhea. People say, "Hey, didn't you read the script?" Yeah I did, and it was pretty good, but it changed throughout production...A LOT. Believe me, I have read a ton of scripts that were horrible, and you just never know how they are going to turn out. EVER. Some end up being HUGE.
I have the first Pirates of the Caribbean script at my house that I got from my friend at Disney. It's 76 pages long with a totally different ending. Johnny Depp's character dances and ends up living underwater in an Atlantis type setting. NO SHIT!!!!!
I have the script for 300, and the scene where they battle for Thermopylae , it just says, "Soldiers fight here." Who knew?! I have the first Scream script where Neve Campbell's character kills Drew Barrymore. Things change.
You just never know.
I recently turned down Delta Farce (the Larry the Cable Guy movie) and decided to do Kickin' It Old Skool instead. Delta Farce is tracking higher. I would never have guessed that a movie about three soldiers who mistakenly believe TIJUANA is IRAQ would be more exciting to people than a breakdancer who's been in a coma for 20 years. (I know, make fun of me here.) I turned down Daddy Day Care to make Malibu's Most Wanted. Daddy did triple the money.
Mike Fleiss and I did a TV show called The Starlet. The New York Times called it the PERFECT reality show. We were pumped, we thought we had Next Top Model on our hands. We even got Faye Dunaway. The show debuted to a .5. For those of you who don't know ratings, that basically means my mom watched it. I'll never understand why it tanked so fantastically.
The point is, I thought I knew what people wanted, but maybe I don't. Maybe I'm destined to be on a third rate sitcom on TBS. The only thing I do seem to have a hold on are my thoughts, and I guess I can share them with you. If you like them, then cool. If you don't, then cool too.
But I'm not up for reading every comment people have, telling me how dumb I am, or what a whore my mother is, or how my acting style is a mix between Saddam's hanging and a Pauly Shore abortion (a real description about me, by the way). If you want to be critical, be critical in context, or constructive. (That's the plot of my next movie: Heckler. More on that to come later.)
So why am I writing this to you? I don't know. I guess I'm looking for new relationships and fresh perspectives outside of the Hollywood quagmire in which I've been ensconced for these past 18 years. Since I've started in this business, those were the only relationships I really had, and I look forward to developing some new ones with you, the reader.
I keep a journal on every movie I've ever done and, rereading this one now, I don't know whether to laugh or cry. My hope and naivete are kind of sweet, I guess, but sometimes I want to go back in time, throttle myself by the neck, and fire my agent. I just hope that if you liked me before, maybe this will help you get to know the real me better. If you hated me, maybe this will make you at least neutral. If you don't care at all, maybe you'll laugh a little.
Here's the first half of my journal from Son of the Mask.
JK
"Mask 2 Diaries"- Journal into Green Madness
11/9/03
I just landed in Sydney. It was Friday night when I left, now it's Sunday morning, weird. It's kind of like being in another world. Everything is a little different, but it's similar. The flight was so long that it felt like we were flying to outer space. When I arrived at the W, it smelled like fish and mothballs. My room is the size of a shoe box. Why do I get treated like the red-headed stepchild? At lunch the waiter asked me if I wanted a fried yabbie. What's a fried yabbie, I ask. He said it's a cross between a lobster and a crawfish. When he brings it, it looks like a cockroach!
11/10/03
I pretty much have everything I need. I've got a car with a driver. I've got a nice rental car. I've got a bus that's my trailer, and all the tofu I can eat. They even gave me a cellphone with all the pertinent numbers plugged in. They take great care of me down here. I feel like I'm in some crazy summer camp. Each day I come here, and we have dog training, baby holding class, stunt driving lessons, drawing class, workout, nap, rehearsal with Traylor [Howard], rehearsal with Alan [Cumming], make-up test, and rewrites. In bed by 11:00pm, and up by 6:00am. No time to get into trouble. The dog is getting pretty good. He's funnier than me. There are no girls here. I haven't had a boner in four days.
11/11/03
I met the babies for the first time today and they are really cute. They even look like they could be me and Traylor's kid. I always said that the number one way this movie has to be good, is to have a cute kid. Well, they got two of them since babies can only work 15 minutes every hour. I also did some car driving today; it was actually good because the steering wheel is where it is supposed to be, on the left hand side. The guy said "Can you handle it?" I said "I'm from L.A."
11/12/03
Third day in a row for dog training. Yeah, he's cute, yeah he's smart, but do we have to practice him jumping on my chest everyday? I mean Jesus!! He tells me how this dog can do a back flip and how there has never been a canine in the history of film, who has flipped on screen. He said it could be groundbreaking! "I'll mention it to the director", I said.
11/13/03
I got my haircut today, and the director (Larry Guterman) freaked out. He called at midnight and said, "The hair's gone?" I told him it will grow back. He's like "You need to be disheveled, not neat. People who raise babies are disheveled." He's right, but the girl who cut my hair was so hot, and prettier than all the Spice Girls put together. I just wanted to sit in her chair for the whole day. Every time she would trim she would say "Is it short enough?' I'd say "Maybe shorter." She smelled like mangos, ahhh! I guess I went too short! Ooops. I also went to the rugby final tonight! It was pretty exciting. I have no idea how the game is played, all I know is the Wallabies won. What's a Wallabie anyway? It's a kangaroo but different. This guy told me that if I wasn't careful, he was gonna shag Traylor in front of me. Well shouldn't he ask her first? That's how these dudes are down under they just scoop girls off the street like Vikings and the women have no say. Traylor pissed me off tonight btw. In the middle of the second half she finishes her Heineken and says flippantly, "Go get us some more beers!" Excuse me, I said, I didn't know the name of this plantation I was workin on. "Why don't you fucking go get it!" I said. She said, "Boy you're becoming a real diva! So used to everybody kissing your ass, you can't even go to get us a couple of Heineys?" I said, "No one's kissing my ass, you could at least say please first, and I'm a diva because I don't want to walk through a bunch of Russell Crowe sound-a-likes painted like yellow kangaroos?" So I go to the counter and get her some beers. Then later I go to the ATM and she tells me to get her out 1000 bucks, she forgot her per diem. I'm like, I have mine, wheres yours? Oh I never carry cash on me , she said. I said "how bout in a foreign country?". Then she screams, "god you're so fuckin' cheap." I give her $500. When did I become the asshole?
11/15/03
Okay, I feel like food here is getting weirder and weirder. At dinner tonight, the waiter tells me the special is seared spatch cock. I asked what it was and he told me it was like chicken but more like a tinier, daintier bird. I said I'll pass, and Traylor said, "Come on don't be so closed off, eat it and live a little." I said I don't eat anything with the word cock in it, "if that makes me closed off, so be it." She huffed and said fine, "I'll eat it, ill eat the fuckin spatchcock." Again I don't know why she had to curse at me, but this is our working relationship. I said " I'll have the whitebait please." The waiter said it was an excellent choice. Well, cut to 20 minutes later and it was exactly what it sounded like; pieces of bait, real bait fish used to go fishing with, fried and served with Tabasco sauce. Wtf! I'm not a Mexican dolphin. Traylor smiles and said, "My spatch cock is delish!"
11/16/03
This week is gonna be brutal. Today I got picked up at 6:45 a.m.; there were tons of make-up test rehearsals and wardrobe fittings. Got home at 9:00 p.m. Even if I had the energy to get a boner, which I don't, it wouldn't matter because I still don't see any females ANYWHERE! The women here are kind of tomboyish, which is fine if you're a lesbian. And everyone here has real boobs. Which isn't great. Why? Because they sag. And they're all freckly. I know it sounds shallow but I miss those two protruding missiles walking down Rodeo Drive with vanilla soy lattes in hand. All the girls here wear turtlenecks and sneakers. I'd kill to see just one pair of Frankie B's and fake melons. Come on ladies, show some skin!
11/17/03
Okay, it's official, the dog is a fuckin' scene stealer. He's doing flips, bouncing balls, playing hockey. We get it, you're cute and lovable. But save some screen time for the rest of us. Every time he does a trick, he gets a treat. A nice piece of turkey. I'd like that, wish someone would give me a little treat. They just say, "Jamie, don't talk so loud you'll scare the dog. Just let the dog lick your face for eight licks Jamie." Well, if you want me to do better, give me some kibble. Im startin' to hate that fuckin' mutt. No matter how good that dog is, he still has to wake up in the morning look in the mirror and say fuck I'm still a dog, Jamie can speak and I can't.
11/18/03
The W Hotel is a bunch of con artists, $35 for eggs? Come on, even Donald Trump would do a double take on that bill. Hey guys, just because you play techno music in the elevators doesn't mean you have the right to molest me financially. I guess it's really hip to overcharge. A side of yogurt is $11. Bullshit, I know why it's called the W, because when people go to check out and get their bill, they go What!? Who spent this!? When did this happen!? Their mind is just pelted with question words that start with W. I got one; how about Whore, or Whoa, I didn't spend this!?
11/19/03
I just realized that these babies have no idea that they are in a movie, not only that but, they didn't give their consent either. How illegal is that?! One day they'll be perusing the aisles at Blockbuster and be like, hold on is that me? When did my parents start selling my home movies, wait this is a real movie? When did I do this? I don't remember shit, where did the money go? Why do I drive a Toyota? Where's the fuckin' cash mom?!!
11/20/03
What are the Lakers doing? Is Shaq's big toe better? Is Rick Fox's back healed? Is Kobe dishing the rock more often? I wouldn't know, because we don't get American sports down here, we get Cricket. What the hell is it? You collect wickets? First off, all the games last 5-6 days, days! Who does that? The score is 174 to 146; why so much, why does only one guy get a glove, why does the guy run at the ball and not throw it? I don't get it! But it's all we watch because these guys don't get Showtime!
11/21/03
I'm so tired, everyone is going to Neil Young. Pass, I know he's a legend and all, but I'm too tired. It's the training. I wanna go out, but I'm too tired. This town is a mix of San Francisco, London, and New York. The hookers on the street are 6 ft. tall. They have restaurants here called Hungry Jacks. It's Burger King, except they changed the name. I have nothing else to say, I guess I'll order a $20 hamburger from room service and watch another rerun of Ab Fab.
11/22/03
I'm so wasted right now. I don't usually drink, but that white wine was good. Australia lost the World Cup tonight and the whole town is all depressed. One girl said "I don't know what to do." I told her to take her top off. She didn't even understand. Drove all around the city tonight looking for a Pizza Hut. They have a Starbucks but no Pizza Huts! What did Keanu do when he was here? I heard he had a girlfriend, where is she? Send her over. Sydney's overrated. Good for the Olympics, bad for procreation. They're all criminals here anyway. It's a colony of robbers and pickpockets.
11/23/03
I look at myself in the mirror way too much. It's like I'm having a homosexual affair with myself. It's really sad. But you know what's worse, it doesn't even have to be a mirror. It could be any shiny surface, a car window, the elevator door, a plate. If it's reflecting, then I'm looking! For what, I dunno. How much has really changed from the taxi cab to the restroom at T.G.I. Fridays? Wow, I just did it again. I'm not kidding, I just looked up from my bed and moved the plant so I could look at my profile while I'm writing this. Why? Really need to cultivate other interests.
11/24/03
It's the first day of shooting, and Larry is having me do another fitting because he doesn't like my undershirt. Not the shirt over the shirt, the shirt under the shirt that is not seen. It's an 81 million dollar movie, we've got babies, dogs, special effects, crazy stunts, script rewrites, foreign country problems, plus the legacy of Jim Carrey to deal with, and Larry is worried about my goddamn undershirt. I said to Larry, "If people are noticing the shirt, then we have a problem." He said, "Don't fuck up my vision Jamie, uphold it!!"
11/25/03
The president of New Line said something nice in the trades today. He said he hopes his next big mission is marrying the right guy and girl with the right piece of material. He's hoping it's Mask 2, with Jamie Kennedy and Alan Cumming. My only thought was who's the girl in that relationship? I hope we can catch some of that "Elf" luck with this movie. ILM better make that fucking baby dance, and make him dance good because right now he's starting to look like the The Hulk, and that's scaring me.
11/26/03
So I did some of my first scene today; it's where the baby pukes green foam on me. After the baby does two shots, this lady comes in and takes the baby. I said, "Where's he going?" She said he was done. I said, "No he's not, we've still got two shots left." She said that he was done and that you can't work a baby more than three hours a day and that they don't work past six p.m., it's illegal. I said to Larry, "You see that shit, she took the baby." He said, "I know man, it's the law, she's the baby police, at six we lose the kid." "That's bullshit" I said. He screamed at me and said "I'm not going to jail for a fuckin infant, Jamie!!!!! Now do the scene to the tennis ball!"
11/27/03
The only crazy thing that happened today was that it was Thanksgiving and nobody mentioned it. We just worked right through. I liked it actually. I think Thanksgiving is kind of boring anyway. I asked one of the caterers and he said that he doesn't celebrate it. He said, "It's an America freedom holiday, we're not free, we're still under the Queens bloody thumbs." BOLLOCKS! I said. The guy just stared at me. "Well shouldn't you do something for all the Americans here?" He huffed. "Well we could sculpt a bust of George Bush out of mashed potatoes, and light them on fire to signify the war he just started mate!!" I thought ok that was hostile. I didn't start the war, I just wanted some cranberries.
11/28/03
So right before I do the opening shot of the movie, Larry decides that he wants me to wear a frumpy Dockers type shirt. I hate it! He says, "No, you're going to church." I told him that I wasn't Andy Richter. After a twenty minute discussion about shirts, we go with my shirt. Not much else is happening. I have been waiting in my huge trailer a lot today. So much better than working at Dominos. Getting pretty horny today. I saw the hottest picture of this girl on the internet. I wish I could make her come out of my computer and make her alive.
11/29/03
What did I do today? Rehearsed the same scene with Larry fifty fucking times.
11/30/03
I just went to the canteen on the lot. I went to get some food there, I asked the guy for some chili and he hands me a green vegetable. I said, "No, chili, like a bowl of chili?" He said, "What's that mate?" He had never even heard of chili. He gave me his card and told me to send him the recipes and we would be mates for life. Oh goodie another mate!
12/1/03
Larry is making me CRAZY! Jesus before I can even get a take out, he's battered me to the ground with how to say it, what to say, why I'm saying it, which way to look, and what I'm having for fucking lunch. FUCK! Worry about your breath, Larry. I could direct you to some Listerine. I know he means well, but he's taking me down the path to crazy land, and I'm going to start lashing out and I don't wanna do that. Now what the fuck is it with the extra takes situation? Every time we do a goddamn shot, it's always moving on, checking the gate. Well shit, can we play a little? One more take? Oh, not enough time, they say. Well then why don't they just hire a robot and fuck him in the ass?!
12/3/03
Today was crazy, we shot a scene all morning as a big happy family. But the baby wouldn't stop crying, and the dog kept trying to sniff the baby, and I kept forgetting my line. Then in the middle of all this Traylor and I had to make out. So I start getting a boner because the only time I get girls down here is when I'm doing a scene. I got the dog licking my leg, kissing Traylor, and I've got to deliver this line, holding the baby, all with a boner. I'm like, "Larry, can you give me a minute, I've got a lot going on." It was like the family version of Caligula!
12/4/03
Things are much better today; we're getting the whole day to shoot our scenes. Everybody is calming down, which is good. I've never felt so much pressure on a set before. It feels like there are times that I could just pop, like my head's gonna blow off my body. I'm angry, tense, frustrated, and I wish the budget wasn't so big. I feel if the movie doesn't perform that it's on MY shoulders. But what if ILM makes the baby look like shit? The Hulk looked like shit. What if the baby still has some Hulk residue on it and the people turn away from this flick? Am I going to have to go back to Domino's?
12/5/03
Okay, it's official! The dog trainer is insane. He talks to his dog as if he's human. He'll be talking to Bear, and he'll get mad when the dog won't do the trick he wants, and he'll say. "Let's get it right dummy." The whole crew will wait, and he'll say, "Hold on guys, I'm sorry, I got a real dum-dum here." Then he'll walk up to the dog and say, "Now come on Bear goddamnit that's not the way we rehearsed it, don't fuck it up." The dog would just sit there with his tongue hanging out, happy as a clam. I mean, isn't that exploitation? He doesn't get any money, and if he does, it's not like he wears pants, so he can keep it in his pockets. It's all lies.
12/6/03
The consensus on the set is that the nurse is a slut. People been coming up to me saying, "Hey the nurse is a slut, the nurse is a slut", Now I didn't think anything of it until she gave me a ginseng drink. She said, "It will keep your cock hard." I said, "Will it help with cold and flu?" She said, "Oh yeah that too." Then I overheard her telling somebody that she had a hard time finding someone that could do her doggy style correctly. As opposed to incorrectly? Nurse, I'm sure the best boy could help you out with that. Now I like the nurse, she never did nothing to me. Why am I writing this? I don't know, but I don't think the nurse did anything inappropriate.
To be continued......
Posted by Jamie Kennedy at 9:05 AM
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Comments
woah new blog here
pretty interesting
and i find you pretty funny anyways, i liked malibu's most wanted
Posted by: syph at May 15, 2007 11:25 AM
Please stay in the industry man. As a fan I can say wholeheartedly Malibu's Most Wanted was 10x better than Daddy Day Care. The journal is a lot of fun to read, so keep posting it up. Glad to see you as part of the Rudius family. Now I have more things to waste my time at work.
Posted by: IndyTruks138 at May 15, 2007 11:35 AM
First Bitches! HA! (I really hate it when people do that.)
Anyway, As a fan and reader of most Rudius Media Blogs, welcome. A great start to what I'm sure will be a great blog.
PS Loved you in Harold and Kumar... And who can forget THe JK Experiment...
Posted by: DamBro at May 15, 2007 11:55 AM
"I really don't know if I can take the ups and downs of this business anymore."
BTW, stick with it bro. Your fuckin talented, fuck em if they don't think so.
Posted by: DamBro at May 15, 2007 11:58 AM
Malibu's Most Wanted is the shit
Posted by: J Rose at May 15, 2007 12:27 PM
I'm sorry to see that you're feeling downtrodden. In all of the interviews I've seen of you, you seem like the nicest, most down-to-earth guy. Keep your head up!
Posted by: Evangeline at May 15, 2007 01:07 PM
Awesome, look forward to more content.
Posted by: C at May 15, 2007 01:23 PM
As to your frusration on an inability to "pick a winner" in your script selection, I will be of no sage council, being a firmly entrenched bastion of demographic insignificance in the public's taste. Ideally though, if you could saddle the right horse once or twice, then you could satisfy your artistic proclivities in relative financial stability. As it is, you're working, you have an audience, and I think you are largely regarded as a quality entertainer with good taste. BTW, I am an entertainment journalist in my little NH town, and I recently interviewed your pal, Bob Saget. Bar none, his was the most gracious and helpful celebrity interview I have ever conducted. Beer came through my nose when he told me that he used to put a shoebox on his lap and give the Olsen twins a puppet show. Best to you...CE
Posted by: Chris Elliott at May 15, 2007 01:27 PM
Welcome to the rudius family! your talent comes out now in your writing as well as your acting. Look forward to reading more!
Posted by: c at May 15, 2007 02:16 PM
Hey man, good blog. I'm an amateur actor myself and it's good to read up on stuff from guys who're actually doing their work and putting up with all this nonsense.
It really helps me get a feel of what it might be like if I'm ever lucky enough to get a job in the business.
Anyway, good reading man. I really look forward to reading your stuff in the future.
Posted by: Coyne at May 15, 2007 02:19 PM
Hey, I have been a big fan of yours for a while. Glad to see your at this site now. I think what you need to do is every gut instinct you get for a movie, go the opposite direction. Anyways, take care.
~Putter
Posted by: Putter at May 15, 2007 02:21 PM
I watched the JK experiment a few times, good stuff. Never saw any of the movies mentioned...But I have to say, I have a new understanding for acting now. Sucks man, like all these guys said, stick with it. You'll find something good sooner or later.
Posted by: Han-shirO at May 15, 2007 02:24 PM
Really interesting inside perspective. Look forward to reading more.
This has to do with the banner at the top. The picture of Jamie on the right has his face disappear at a weird spot around the nose and chin. You can also see a room and a door in the mirror of his shades even though he appears to be outside in the dessert.
Posted by: brevity at May 15, 2007 02:59 PM
I never saw that second mask, I guess it was because i didn't think it'd be any good. I feel kinda bad now, cuz ur a pretty good actor and you amke me laugh. I'm not famous, famous is to much, I want to be semi-famous, enough that people go hey I know him, he was in that one movie with Ted Danson or something, but not where they know my name. I play World of Warcraft, it's soothing, no one judges you, you should try something like that. Keep it real dude.
Posted by: Jamie White at May 15, 2007 03:01 PM
awesome! some real funny shit. if it don't see some of this in Palm Beach or Sweden, i'mma kick you in the testamicles.
Posted by: Anonymous at May 15, 2007 03:09 PM
I'm not much of a blog reader but, fuck me, I'm hooked. Amazingly interesting insight in to the behind the scenes machinations of movie making and what goes on in the head of an actor. I would have thought after Harold and Kumar, JK experiment, B-Rad and the rest girls would be throwing themselves at you. The added sexual tension that most guys face made for an interesting read as well. I'm hooked mate, keep em coming.
Posted by: Doc Johnson at May 15, 2007 03:11 PM
The thing is: Daddy Day Care was a family/kid's movie, whereas Malibu's Most Wanted Wasn't. The first Mask was awesome, but we all knew the second couldn't top the first without Jim Carrey.
Posted by: Jesus H. Christ at May 15, 2007 03:28 PM
I'm so glad that you joined the site! I really enjoyed your first entry! I love just about all of the blogs on here...so I'll be checking back to yours for sure..cuz you kick ass!
Much Love!
Posted by: Amber at May 15, 2007 03:44 PM
Man I didn't think rudius could get any better until they gave my favorite actor a blog. first tucker max now this? I think I just came a little
Posted by: logan at May 15, 2007 04:47 PM
Glad to see you as part of the Rudius family. I look forward to reading your entries!
Posted by: Fenrir at May 15, 2007 05:02 PM
Malibu's Most Wanted is one of the funniest movies I have seen. Mallrats bombed at the box office too, look how good that one turned out, people eventually figure out whats good and whats not.
Posted by: Amanda at May 15, 2007 06:10 PM
u make me sad when ur sad. so be happy
Posted by: angie at May 15, 2007 06:34 PM
I understand how you feel. I admit I watched Son of the Mask for about 15 minutes before I switched to something else. But you're really funny, and talented (and cute)! The Jamie Kennedy Experiment used to be my favorite show.
Posted by: T at May 15, 2007 08:00 PM
I have to say, I did not like you prior to reading this blog. All your small parts have been enjoyable but when you star in roles you can get old very quick. But regardless I read this whole blog without pause, you're crude and honest humor is so much better than your "LETS SEE WHAT HAPPENS" from the JK Experiment. I can see how a continuation of the Mask seemed like a project you'd be crazy to pass up, but if movie's have taught us anything it's that any movie starting with "The Son of" will be crap. Also that role defined Jim Carrey not only as a comedian but an actor, and has since been synonymous with his name. The role revealed him, not the other way around, and I believe every role I've seen you in has just been a hashed up cliche character that whose name you forget when the credits finish. I believe that if you can pull off what you've written here in a role, Jamie Kennedy could be a new addition to the A-List.
Posted by: Alex at May 15, 2007 11:56 PM
Jamie never ceases to amaze me. Just when I'm getting lulled into thinking you're just writing a section for information, you'll bust out a funny and poignant reference... like about how Dogs don't have pants... that's the last time I let a dog think he's bettern me!
Posted by: bill dawes at May 16, 2007 12:07 AM
So you're a rugby fan? Come out to OSU and we'll show you how to play!
Yes, I am completely serious.
Posted by: Lockit at May 16, 2007 05:13 AM
Jamie, I hope you know that WHATEVER you do, your loyal fans are going to be behind you EVERY STEP OF THE WAY, and I AM YOUR #1 FAN and all of us JkWorlders over at Jamie Kennedy World all have your back...I just wish that there was more that all of us as fans could do ....What can I say except the critics suck?? Maybe they should let us "ordinary peeps" rate the movies once in a while..MMW was a classic and always will be..long live the JKX and damn Ashton for stealing your ideas!!!lol...and the future holds alot in store for you baby...roll with the punches cuz' in the long run you're gonna' shine even more than you already are....We love ya' J!!! Mary B the OG
Posted by: Mary B the OG from Holyoke, MA at May 16, 2007 05:41 AM
Welcome to the blog worl Mr. K. Keep living the life my man, keep living the life. A 3rd rate sitcome on TBS is a shit load better than the 9-5 grind of nonethingness that you never hoped to be. You are living your dream and regardless of how lucrative it may or may not be just remember you are going after what is your passion and nothing hold more treasure than that.
Posted by: Tiki at May 16, 2007 06:13 AM
From a movie-goer perspective, you probably want to distance yourself from anything that looks like the white-guy-acts-black routine. Even though that's not what Kicking It Old Skool was about, I can guarantee you people saw the poster, thought it was a re-hash of Malibu's Most Wanted and said, "I didn't like the other one, why would I see this."
Posted by: leggoeggo at May 16, 2007 06:19 AM
I got the point of "Song of the Mask". I also know a three year old girl who makes me watch it every time I come to her house
Posted by: Anonymous at May 16, 2007 06:21 AM
Hilarious.
Posted by: Bunny at May 16, 2007 10:22 AM
shits yellow b, rizzys the color nugga
Posted by: Eric at May 16, 2007 10:26 AM
You need to spend more time with Bob Saget. Aftreall, he is the illest mutha fucka in a cardigan sweater.
Posted by: Shan027 at May 16, 2007 11:14 AM
Its not your job to pick great scripts its your agent and managers, its your job to capture the audiences attention with your humor and charm. You have definately done your job Mr. Kennedy. Everytime i watch you on television or in the theatre i think to myself damn i want to have that guys babies. Your a risk taker and unfortunately critics like to shit on risk takers, all you have to do is stick it out and you will without a doubt come out on top. Youve earned my respect along the way. Love you, xo
Posted by: Crystal Marie at May 16, 2007 04:06 PM
Your acting style is a mix between Saddam's hanging and a Pauly Shore abortion with a dash of a dead baby seal(for good measure).
Sorry, I couldn't resist.
Btw, DON'T QUIT!!!
You're still in a fuckin' great position. Keep it movin'. You'll regret that shit.
You've got too many years left on the planet, man.
Peace.
Posted by: Helluvagreatguy at May 16, 2007 04:48 PM
Jamie-
It's good to see you have a blog setup in the Rudius network. You are a real literate guy.
I hate to say it, but instead of acting you should try to focus on writing. I think you could kill it as a ghost writer / music producer.
I've got a small music production thing going on in Brooklyn. Nothing major label just a few protools studios here and there. If you want to get on some underground viral rap shit Get at me!
-Marak
Posted by: Marak at May 16, 2007 06:17 PM
I think it's great that you're on with Rudius bro. You need to start getting into "blockbuster" movies such as TRANSFORMERS! We both know you can act and do big roles. It's time for you to get a good director on a great movie. You've got my vote man. I hope all is great with you.
Posted by: Wayland at May 16, 2007 07:21 PM
Good comedy directors let their talent act and improv. Bad directors are anally retentive and take all the comedy out of the film. Every successful comedy has actors talking about how they enjoyed themselves so much on the set, were friends with everyone excetera. Obviously the directors of the Son of the Mask didn't understand this.
Posted by: G-rizzo at May 16, 2007 07:22 PM
I always respected your stand up, but never really got into your movies. This blog looks to be well written though. I look forward to further entries.
Posted by: John Hall at May 16, 2007 08:35 PM
For a fresh perspective, just remember that the average movie-goer has the attention span of a chihuahua. I see "the mask 2," without jim carrey, and I think that I don't care who's in it I'm not gonna go. Malibu's Most Wanted was a pretty decent movie, enough that they replay it often on comedy central. I don't really see daddy day care being re-run on tv all too often. Kickin it old skool, someone else said it best, it just looked like malibu 2 with a slightly different theme. And Blowin' Up. Put Malibu, Old Skool, and Blowin up together, know that jamie kennedy is in them, and having not watched them you can assume the whole JK is a kinda funny wigger thing, who's milkin it dry for all it's worth. As someone who thinks you have enormous potential for hilarity, try a role that's completely different for you. Not some goofy, heart-of-gold white rapper stereotype that you're about an inch away from being typecast as for the rest of your career. Some character that doesn't have any part of yourself in it, someone you can invent as an actor. If I saw you in a movie like that, specifically having nothing to do with goofy white rapping, I would definitely go to see it. Good luck man you still have plenty of cred with the fans
Posted by: Jon at May 17, 2007 10:28 AM
Yea, I definitely loved JKX. Who you rollin wit? I'm rollin wit Saget!
Keep writing, I want to read more!!
Posted by: Nick at May 17, 2007 06:40 PM
I loved Malibu's Most Wanted.
And you were totally hawt in it.
Posted by: Annie at May 17, 2007 07:15 PM
Dear Jaime,
It is wonderful that you finally got a blog here.
Because I can finally tell you that Son of Mask is complete shit. Don't believe all the cock-suckers and well-wishers. It is hands-down the worst movie I have ever seen and I cannot believe you guys had a US$80 million budget to make the garbage. Your movie made trash movies like "Plan 9 from Outer Space" looked like Ben-Hur. And you choose this over "Without a Paddle"?
I hope you had already killed your agent.
Posted by: Thomas Lee at May 18, 2007 03:06 AM
I'm listening to you right now on wild95.5 in West Palm and it's hilarious.
I loved your show and personally, I love Malibu's Most Wanted.
This blog is really funny...I hope you update it often.
Posted by: Gabs at May 18, 2007 06:50 AM
this is random and off topic, but did you happen to sit on a highway divider on the bruckner expressway in ny say, last week, by any chance?
Posted by: k. at May 18, 2007 03:16 PM
I LOVE JAMIE KENNEDY..HE IS MY IDOL
Posted by: heather at May 19, 2007 06:31 AM
Your movies make you look like a dousche. My eyes are opened. It just shows how stupid I and the average watcher are.
And about Delta Farce, well I think that in 5 years you'll be better off for not associating with Larry the Cable Guy in any way. That guy is gonna go down hard. Fuck, that guy is awful. I swear to god that guy's shit will knock substantial points off of your IQ if exposure is prolonged.
Also 'Kickin It Old School' was good and JKX was great.
Posted by: stabmastershank at May 19, 2007 08:48 PM
I've heard your name before, but I don't think I've seen anything you were in. However, your blog is pretty amusing.
I see you're having a shortage of clam, surely you could make friends with one or two of the locals and they'd help you out?
Posted by: Seraphynae at May 20, 2007 02:17 PM
Nevermind on that last comment, I just now noticed the dates of the journal posts. Yeah, that's how out of touch I am with mainstream movies.
Posted by: Seraphynae at May 20, 2007 02:25 PM
About fucking time someone gave Jamie Kennedy an outlet where he could be funny for a change. You really do have shit luck when it comes to that.
Posted by: Beavis Saves at May 21, 2007 07:07 AM
ive always enjoyed watching you in your many comedic roles. you fit into a very specific niche that i happen to enjoy the shit out of.
dont change a thing, pretty much every person i know loves your work.
*adds this site to favorites on my cell phone*
Posted by: ben at May 21, 2007 07:20 AM
Let me start by saying that I'm not a HUGE fan. I enjoyed your work in the SCREAM movies and have found some of your other work to be very good, though not always my cup of tea. Not your fault, more the actual stories themselves.
I did not see THE SON OF MASK, mostly because I didn't think that the story needed a sequel. It had NOTHING to do with you, and I do believe to this day that your role in it would probably have been the only part of it that I would have enjoyed.
All that said, PLEASE don't leave the business. I always wanted to be in it and the only thing stopping me are the odds. They always talk about the odds being against you as an actor. You defied those odds. People know who you are. You're in their minds, and so long as that happens there will be things for you to do.
I can't pick a good property, myself. I usually find that shows (for example) that I resist watching, I generally find myself LOVING when I finally do catch them (HOUSE being foremost in my mind). Point being, don't try. Find the ones that interest you. That make you laugh. That make you cry. That make you think. Whatever you're in it for, do it for that. A lot of people like watching the monkey jump through the hoop. It sells a lot of tickets. They won't remember his name. Be the guy whose name they remember for doing something good. And even if you're not headlining, you can be great. SCREAM (1 & 2) proved that.
And whatever you do, keep posting. It's another way to touch the world, and goodness knows if you're willing to honestly put your heart out there (as you seem to have), people WILL appreciate it.
Posted by: JMR at May 21, 2007 01:11 PM
Jamie you are the perfect example of why people hate americans.
Hey, Im overseas experiencing a new culture, what do I want for dinner, fuckin pizza hut and chile. If I come to the US Im hardly gonna be looking for VB, Fish and Chips, meat pies and kangaroos.
Australians know what Chile is, we just dont eat it because its shit and irritating and loud....like americans. By the way American women are so freakin hot, you know Paris Hilton shiving her cell mate, Lindsay Lohan on crack, Britney trying to hang herself....real fuckin hot!
How do you not find a pair of fake tits in Sydney?!?!?! Did you even leave the set?
You fuckwit...
I hope you realise that you totally fuck Anthony Anderson's career with Malibus most wanted.
And Without a paddle was hilarious!
Posted by: micka at May 21, 2007 10:33 PM
Jamie,
Everyone second guesses decisions in life. That will never change. You are a talented guy that makes me laugh. You know what you have to do. Keep it up I will continue to read your blog.
Posted by: David at May 22, 2007 09:41 AM
Loved the journal JK.
I could never take the volatility and probability games of show biz. Kudos to sticking with it if it's something you love. Most occupations involve deals with asshole people, however. I prefer to build relationships outside of my occupation to make life more tolerable, interesting, and noncompetitive. It provides for a bigger perspective. Keep on keeping on.
Posted by: Er at May 22, 2007 01:49 PM
i think you're being a little hard on yourself for your barometer of what's good. it's not that you keep picking bad projects that's the problem. it's your complete lack of talent and that you ooze unlikability both in person and on screen. if i was pauley shore, i'd be offended people are now comparing you to me.
Posted by: Anonymous at May 22, 2007 06:47 PM
Nice.
Posted by: Dabby at May 23, 2007 08:40 AM
Thanks Jamie,
I really enjoyed reading your new blog! Just came across it today as I was reading some of Bill's stuff. I especially enjoyed the bits about the dog trainer.
In your 11/12/03 entry,I think you had already realised he was insane (the dog trainer that is - not Bill....well now come to think of it...hmmmm...). By the time you got to the 12/05/03 entry you were saying it was "official". I was laughing a lot. Your naivety was endearing, but I think it is just because you are a nice guy, who was prepared to give him a chance, that you tolerated his eccentricities as long as you did. You are commical and your writing ability shines through. I'm pleased that you kept a journal for our, eventual, reading pleasure and amusement. Ignore the haters on here. MORE, MORE PLEASE....
Posted by: IRISHNBRITISH at May 23, 2007 08:54 AM
I think a lot of kickin it old schools lack of success can be due to marketing. i had no idea it was about a breakdancer who had been in a coma for 20 years. it just looked like a cheapo movie making fun of break dancing. it had no buzz on the radio or anything. at least delta farce looks so terrible it might be good.
and yeah, you probably shouldnt be so hard on yourself- you had your own tv show (which was pretty good), and have been in nationally released movies. thats much better than 99.9999% of actors out there can claim.
Posted by: Alex at May 23, 2007 09:07 AM
Honestly Jamie I think you suck... I'm sorry but thats the way i fell although you were pretty decent in romeo and juliet but to be hoenst your type of comedy is dieing out. It's a bit over the top and too...BIG instead of subtle humor that makes references to pop culture that seems to be popular today such family guy type humor But from what ive read so far you are very good at writing and i am seeing you in a far different light then i ever did before. I hope that you will continue to write posts because you are a very talented writer and your first post has ALOT of potential
Posted by: Anonymous at May 23, 2007 09:38 PM
Wow. This is one of the biggest responses to a new blog I've seen on Rudius. Congrats!
I always find it interesting whenever an actor branches away from the screen into other genres: music, sports, writing, etc. Most of the time, its a huge, embarrassing bust (whether they want to admit it or not). Yet, in this case, your writing is impressive and insightful--definitely worth taking the time to read.
Good luck in the future, although I think your frustration only ignites your writing. Looking forward to more...
Posted by: Devon at May 24, 2007 08:42 AM
Mr. Kennedy, I think you are learning a lot from your mistakes. Most clowns don't even acknowledge their "mistakes." You know exactly where you fucked up. Keep making films and eventually you'll hit the groove. You got skillz, kid.
Posted by: Voivodish at May 25, 2007 08:31 PM
I love those pussies who post that type of mean shit anonymously. Whoever you are, I guarantee this:
1) if you're a woman, you're a cunt.
2) if you're a man, you're a loser and an aspirant. Furthermore, you have an itty-bitty cock.
Everyone has done bad work and/or made shitty choices in this biz. I'm sure you filed something incorrectly from your carpeted cubicle there before, hardcharger.
I'd love to meet someone like you in person so I could choke you the fuck out.
Posted by: bill dawes at May 26, 2007 03:49 AM
A quasi-celeb gets a blog and everyone starts sucking his dick. Big surprise.
Jamie, you can honestly say that you didn't think your new movie wouldn't be a piece of shit? Or that Son of the Mask could've been a success? I understand that scripts change and etc., but this shit was never good in the first place.
You've got enough money and connections. Why not write an indie vehicle for yourself and show the world what you're fucking made of? Prove you're better than a B-Rad.
Posted by: Jeff at May 26, 2007 02:05 PM
I am somewhat embarrassed to say that I am happy to hear about a celebrity being depressed (and that that depression has nothing to do with booze/drugs). It makes me feel better about myself.
No, but really, cheer up dude! Go get some hollywood pussy. You could also do all your loyal readers a favor and get some nudey pics of some female celebs or something.... that would cheer up anyone!
by the way; your mother's a whore.... jk
Posted by: ultimateaphrodisiac at May 26, 2007 02:20 PM
i agree with whoever said that mmw was better than daddy day care. and i forget everything else i was going to say.
i love you!!
Posted by: nicole at May 26, 2007 10:56 PM
You rock. Keep writing.
Posted by: anf at May 27, 2007 06:30 AM
Hmmm...I'm not a psychologist, but the way you described your looking in the mirror (or any shiney surface for that matter) sounds like you are (or were) becoming vain and self-obsorbed. It sucks, but that's what I'm drawing from it. I won't preach to you about that, though - it'd make me wanna kick my own ass for being annoying.
Posted by: Michelle at May 28, 2007 02:02 AM
Hey man. I have a couple things that ran through my head when reading the first part.
It's a good thing you started this blog! Actors are judged on their movie choices, and since you seem to have been sort of categorized as a comedy wigger (I haven't seen Malibu's Most Wanted and your new break dancing flick, but come on... they seems like twins), you've been judged.
First off, it seems like you "have" to choose a script. The last thing you want to do is wear out your welcome, but you describe the situation as "I had to choose between Delta Farce and Daddy Day Care," etc. How about this: don't make dopey comedy films. Every film you listed sucked. None of them can be classified as "good movies", hence, you can not be classified as a "good actor." So what if you had actually chosen Daddy Day Care? It was still a dumbass generic comedy. You seem like a smart guy, and I wonder why you stick to only comedy. As much as you may hate it, maybe you should do a drama or something a little more serious. Above I said that some actors can wear out their welcome, and an example of that is Jack Black. As awesome as he is, his dopey comedies were still only mediocre, and he made a ton of them. But he's revitalized by doing King Kong. It stretched him as an actor and showed a new side. I used to watch the JK experiment, and you have talent. I think you can make it, but don't just snap up any project you get. I'd advise you to do something that gets you "street cred" and respect. And your next movie should not be a "white man in a black comedy". You'll be better off for it.
To put it all in perspective though, I am a college student and amateur film maker/wannabe film buff. You're the one making money off the entertainment business.
Also, good blog, I was pleasantly suprised to find that you are literate :)
Posted by: Nionix at May 29, 2007 08:09 PM
first of all, you're a funny ass dude who is obviously talented. the jk experiment was brilliant... probably the funniest hidden camera show ever created...
the movies were horrible though, but i can't imagine inserting any comedian into those flics and seeing it work... as a creative type, you need to create something on your own - your own vision - where YOU have the control - otherwise it may never work...
in my potentially flawed opinion, you are very likely to receive offers only from cookie-cutter type movies...
do jkx the movie (it would work) - model the jackass formula...
Posted by: CR James at May 31, 2007 01:57 AM
JK - Enjoyed the first post, how about an update for chrissakes?
Posted by: creamofsumyungguy at May 31, 2007 06:55 AM
traylor howard gave you a boner
that's stuff worth reading
aren't sequels usually suicide, as mentioned in the sequel to scream? didn't your character say that?
fratire is hard to get right, isn't it?
Posted by: nits at May 31, 2007 01:30 PM
I'd think that if you would spent more time worrying about what the public likes rather than what you like then you probably wouldn't be all too happy with yourself. A $200 Million movie that in terms of literary and dramatic aspects sucks is infinitely worse than an independent "pro bono" film that is quirky all the way through.
Besides, your acting may probably seem that bad because you don't put as much into your job as you would if you definitely liked the script. Obviously most method actors aren't breakdancers who are in comas for twenty years, and therefore wouldn't quite know how to do that as well as...I dunno, a guy down on his luck in far off lands trying to make a buck. And not knowing how to play rugby. Just have fun with it, man.
Posted by: PersonMan at June 1, 2007 10:03 PM
I guess I'm the only around here who thinks you should take the wigger roles to their natural conclusion--a romcom starring you and Mo'Nique. In all seriousness, however, I really enjoy the site. Thanks for being open enough to share your reflections.
Posted by: Nurgirl at June 2, 2007 03:26 PM
Just a comment. Loved the Blog, Waiting for new Post.....
Please.
Posted by: sharky at June 4, 2007 02:49 PM
Ok. So Daddy Day Care made more money....but Malibu's Most Wanted was waaaay funnier. Hell, you'll have a hit and the money will be there, but just remain positive in the merit of your work. I really enjoy you. I'll never forget "circle cirle dot dot".
Posted by: Liz at June 4, 2007 07:07 PM
All of your movies were severely underrated. You deserve much more credit for your abilities than you get.
But, I do have to say I hated you for about 6 months after my little brother watched Malibu's Most Wanted. He thought he was black before that movie...it only got worse. But...now he knows he's white ;-)
Loves
Posted by: Courtney at June 5, 2007 01:19 AM
fuggedaboutit Jamie, Malibu's Most Wanted is some quality cinema. It's honest at least.
I was crushin' on you in Scream.
Posted by: Sarah at June 7, 2007 08:48 PM
I think Nionix has a point - I didn't find Jack Black nearly as annoying in King Kong as I usually do with his other movies. Same goes for The Holiday. Then again, I just don't find him to be all that funny...
Posted by: Michelle at June 13, 2007 05:28 AM
I've enjoyed the movies that you have done save for Son of the Mask, I refuse to even watch that one. Not because of you , but for the premise. Ugh. JK Experiment was a great show, kudos for that.
I agree with Nionix about the choices of scripts though, perhaps you need a new agent or someone to help you with those decisions?
Posted by: Adam at June 14, 2007 10:52 AM
The industry is a bitch these days (I'm sure you know that more than I do). It's hard for me as the consumer to find a good show on TV or sadly even in the theaters. I wouldn't go after any sequals if I were you or for that matter any remakes of films. (it's getting old but not as old as reality TV) Right now the internet is ruling more than television which isn't helping any professional actors out. Maybe you should take on a more serious film and try your luck that way. My best wishes, Becca.
Posted by: becca at June 14, 2007 09:26 PM
I cant believe you have to approve the comments on this site before they are allowed up... you fucking loser. I repeat my previous sentiment in the hope that you actually read these:
You are a fucking hack. Die in a fire you turbo loser
Posted by: WOW at June 14, 2007 11:58 PM
You should just give me every script you get and if I hate it, then it will be a shitty movie.
Posted by: Cameron at June 15, 2007 02:48 AM
Pretty crazy reading your blog, because it reminds me so much of the book I wrote, just because of feelings like these, "The Verge of Psychosis: An Aspiring Actor's Journal." (Link above in my name) Not implying anything, just saying I feel you on that (and of course want to promote my book to people who will get it).
My advice, if you want to write something original, and build up relationships from people other than Hollywood that may fuel something more creative, is to get the fuck out of town. Just get away from it all and say fuck it for a while. Do something completely different. Forcing it doesn't help, especially for comedy. Of course, easier said that done, because I tell myself this same shit everyday, but I haven't listened yet.
Also, everybody read my book. It's fucking awesome. Fuck.
-Bill Dawes Sr.
Posted by: Brian Laesch at June 15, 2007 11:37 AM
i always begrudgingly laughed at your shit, (probably due in part to the fact that you once made out with my ex wife at the five spot) but reading this has given me a new perspective on your career. i can see how one could end up making some of the turds that you have. my only advice would be leave the wigger thing alone. seriously, it was barely funny the first 3 times... im just sayin...
Posted by: coady at June 17, 2007 08:58 PM
DUDE...WRITE SOMETHING NEW! you're on Rudius for a reason. CAUSE PEOPLE ACTUALLY READ IT!
Posted by: Z at June 18, 2007 01:26 PM
Jamie, keep your chin up buddy. Do what you think is right and what you like, not what you think people will like. If you seem more natural in your settings and enjoy what you're doing people will see that. Don't try to impress people, you're a good person. There's tons of people that have been famous by choosing a good indie script instead of a multi million dollar blockbuster that could eventually bomb.
Posted by: Katie Walter at June 23, 2007 03:15 PM
i love you jamie... you a wonderful actor..and your sexy...
Posted by: heather at June 28, 2007 07:50 AM
Hey Jamie-Keep your chin up! I saw you at The Laugh Factory in N.Y.C. last year and I think that you are funny as all hell! Brought my dad with me to see you and he thinks you're hilarious,too. Whenever I need to cheer up, I pop in my JKX dvds for a good laugh. You are so creative!( and cute!)
Posted by: Christa at July 8, 2007 09:52 PM
Why did yo not eat me on bread
I'm the spread, down here dawg!
Sydney does have a few loose fops in it, at least you don't live in their stomach for hours don't be sour
ur funny, Great blog
Posted by: VEGEM'iight at August 21, 2007 11:59 PM
Yo Jamie, don't let the business get you down. Can't say I've gotten anywhere near as far as you have in the entertainment industry but we all know it's full of the most self-righteous inane douches the world has to offer. There's nothing more refreshing than seeing you keep it real with this blog - keep writing in it; it'll help keep you sane. You have my love and support bro - and if you're ever in the Tampa area hit me up.
Won - Horace W.i.m.p.
Posted by: Horace W.i.m.p. at October 6, 2007 03:01 PM
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